Living in the Last Hour

We must be careful what we pray for…

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Irm

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We must be careful what we pray for...

On our trip to Phoenix, I caught this photo of a wrecked vehicle sitting of to the side of the road, left abandoned, it seemed. The police were there investigating the wreckage. It was an interesting image that I took a couple of weeks ago…did not give it any mind, until I started reading Samuel.

Anyway, I am up to 1 Samuel in my year through the Bible and the Lord continues to reveal Himself to me. I am always left in awe. How good is my God!

Well, I started reading 1 Samuel earlier in the week. As I read, it was much the same as in previous books, God taking care of His people, testing them and indulging at times. When I got to chapter 10, God was upset with His children as they were demanding a king. “But today you have rejected your God, who saves you from all your calamities and your distresses, and you have said to him, ‘Set a king over us.’”  It got me to thinking about my requests. I have been struggling for a while, and in all that time the Lord has always taken care of me. No, He has not blessed me in abundance, but He has met my needs. His grace is sufficient, as the Word says.

Recently, because of my continued circumstances, I continually ask the Lord to search me, to show me what I am doing wrong, to show me what in me was holding Him back from blessing me.  Why don’t you bless me? I cried out to the Lord. As I pondered the scripture, my requests were presented to me, and the Lord showed me truth. My requests: a job, a car, or at least blessing the work of my hands, maybe a husband to at least take care of my needs. The last eight years have left me what has been defined as nothing less than a beggar.  Even though the Lord has sustained me, others do not see any evidence of His grace. Others, non-believers and believers alike measure me by the standards of the world. Shame on Christians, they should know better.

Anyway…what did God say you ask?  He was quite clear. In asking for these things, God said ” I have always provided for you, and you too reject me by asking for these “things” these worldly counterparts. Things that do not satisfy. God provided, protected and sustained me all these years and I was telling Him, it was not sufficient. I needed to work. If anything, I told the Lord that fellow Christians believe I am wrapped up in some sort of sin and that is why the Lord does not bless me.  I asked Him…Lord, in me asking for these things is that the same as asking for a king? Lord, what are you saying? I prayed.

I prayed and told God, OK. I accept this from you, but show me, confirm to me that this is from you and not just my thoughts judging me. So, God being God, did that just and the next day, it was confirmed.

Sometimes, as Christians, we ask God for things that we believe He wants us to have, such as work and basic stuff.  We forget that God knows all our needs, even before we ask. So He gives us what we want and the result is wrecked lives.  Like Rich Mullins sang…

“Surrender don’t come natural to me
I’d rather fight You for something I don’t really want
Than to take what You give that I need…

Rich Mullins – Hold Me Jesus

No one knows the heart of man, except God. Sure, we need to work to provide for our needs, but it is God that directs our path. Is there a job for me out there, somewhere? Perhaps, maybe not according to the ways of this world, but my desire is to do the will of the Father. Seriously, this world is quickly fading and those still caught up in the world will have a difficult time separating. If anything they will be easier to lead astray.  Praise be to our God!

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Hello,

I’m Irma

Welcome to my little corner of the blog world. Here, I share my thoughts on Christianity, the things of God, and the ways He has shaped and guided my path through life. My journey with the Lord has been long and transformative, marked by moments of peace and joy and periods of uncertainty. I write, first and foremost, for myself—to process what the Lord so graciously reveals to me in Scripture. Sharing some of these truths has become a mission of sorts, via blogging. His word urges us to bear witness and encourage one another.

As I reflect on my own transformation, I can say that the church itself has transformed over the years and not necessarily for the good. I speak about my own experiences with the church. One lesson the Lord impressed upon me this year is that “truth is not always truth.” What do I mean by that? There have been times when I’ve shared a biblical insight, only to realize that other faithful believers interpret the same passage differently. In that instance, I find that the Lord reveals according to our understanding. When I share the need for a Damascus experience understandings diverged sharply. Believers that have been raised in the church do not feel that such an extreme experience is necessary for spiritual maturity. Our faith is truly shaped by our backgrounds. Spiritual journeys are not for everyone. This taught me that early socialization deeply colors our grasp of faith; what’s true for me may not resonate in the same way for someone else.

Similarly, lately I considered how “ignorance of Scripture was its own blessing,” I remembered my early walk with Christ. I had a blind faith. I knew little of doctrine or debate. I trusted the pastor. In those days, my faith and trust in the church and church leaders was simple—I accepted what was taught from the pulpit without questioning. I did not have the knowledge needed to question any teaching. There was a peace in not knowing all the controversies or complexities. As I grew and studied the scriptures, and did some additional research, as the Lord gave understanding, I found myself questioning everything I had been taught. I did not question my faith, or the existence of God. That ignorance, while limiting, protected me from confusion and doubt, allowing me to rest in childlike faith.

The church itself has seen many changes over the decades. Self-proclaimed prophets have introduced new doctrines, some bordering on heresy, while believers wrestle with their flesh and what it means to follow Christ in a society with so many freedoms. I remember a time, more than thirty years ago, when I trusted every word spoken in church. Now, I understand how easy it is to accept teachings that stray from biblical truth. The Scriptures warned us this would happen in the last days.

2 Timothy 4:2-4 (NKJV) “Preach the word! Be ready in season and out of season. Convince, rebuke, exhort, with all longsuffering and teaching. For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables.”

Current events—like the 2024 Election—have exposed deep flaws in American Christianity. Yet, through it all, Scripture assures me that God is sovereign. No wall built by human hands can withstand His judgment; no scheme crafted in darkness escapes His light. These lessons have become more real to me as I look back over my journals, filled with stories of God’s faithfulness during trials, tribulations and abundant grace. By sharing I hope those the Lord leads here will desire to seek God wholeheartedly, to find comfort knowing that He is always at work in our lives—often in ways we never considered.

Check out my books on Amazon for the Kindle App or in print.

Check out my latest title: Where are my Sheep? Available in Print & Kindle

The Diary of A Christian Woman

A Father Takes All: Four Generations of Growing up in Single Mother Homes – Grace Abounds

I Will Not Be Afraid: Living in the last Hour – Reflections of a Christian Woman

The Journey Endured: The Path to Meet God

Praise the God of the heavens!